While We’re Waiting

I had to hunt through my drafts for this post, the idea (and title) having first been conceptualized in 2022 (!), almost two years ago. (I guess you could say my writer’s brain is consistent, at least…) I remember when I first came up with the title, it was vastly different than what has re-inspired me to pen this post. We’re all waiting on something right now – and we have been our whole lives.

We spend much of our lives waiting: as children, we just can’t wait to be like the older kids, so we can drive, shave our legs, and go out with friends. Then, when we do become teenagers, we realize it’s not all it’s cracked up to be – and we want to be adults. And so it continues into adulthood, when we find ourselves waiting for love or our perfect person; for a better-paying job; to finally execute our life-long dreams; to be where we want to be in life. Then we might find or acquire one of those things, however we’re always searching for and waiting on the next goal, aspiration, or frankly, high to make us happy. It truly never ends.

It’s a lot of hurry up and wait. Because life is hard (nay, exhausting) – and because good things take time.

I don’t know what you are patiently (or impatiently) anticipating right now: maybe it’s one of the aforementioned milestones; likely it’s a higher salary or some other type of financial windfall. Maybe it’s a baby you’ve wanted your whole life; a proposal; a new house; or news from the doctor about a loved one’s health. It could be some or all of those things, even.

So what do we do while we’re waiting? I’m beginning to realize none of the things I am waiting on are going to make me happy. True happiness would come from inner peace and finding solitude from the literal and figurative noise; from solving (or better managing) one or more of my chronic health issues; from being able to see my family more often – but it will not come from the temporary highs I am chasing. A tangible or material item is not going to bring us true joy, despite its symbolism. Similarly, moving into a quieter neighborhood or finally escaping to the countryside will still yield its fair share of problems, likely distant neighbors who have a “healthy” gun collection.

I think what we do while we wait says much about us as a person. It is during the waiting period that we can develop strengths like resilience and patience. Patience does not come easily to everyone – if you are a patient person by nature, then I applaud you, because I surely am not! Over the past few months, I have been waiting on many things, some that weigh more heavily on me than others. Some, like mental wellness, will take the rest of my life to achieve. Others, like financial stability, are perhaps more within reach. And during the waiting period, we can also focus on what we already have. I have been making a concerted effort every single day to remind myself of all the positives; to focus on everything I have been given in life and how far I have come in my sobriety, in finding my voice and (hopefully) growing as a writer, and in other areas of life. To no longer be alone and to finally have met my person is incredible: it is a sense of relief in and of itself. And to have a loving family, a roof over my head, a chance at a fresh start, a cat that loves me in his own little aloof way: these things all bring me great joy, happiness, and a sense of comfort.

Whatever it is that you’re waiting on, I hope that you, too, are able to focus on the positives; to find it within yourself to appreciate this waiting period for all that it will teach you – but not to lose faith in whatever it is you are eagerly anticipating. As I am fond of saying, “There is strength in the struggle” – and these periods of waiting can teach us so much about ourselves and help us to refocus as we look for just the tiniest shred of patience.